The Story That Started The Adventure {Her Side}

Full Disclosure: I HATE ONLINE DATING!

Don’t get me wrong, I see it’s benefits:

• It’s good for the on-the-goer, who doesn’t have time to go out.

• It’s perfect for those without singles of like mind in the area.

• It's wonderful for those who are socially awkward and don't know how to strike up a conversation otherwise.

I’ve been scared of it since my immature childhood mind spun my mom’s virtual love story into a horror story. After growing up a few years, the fear hasn’t subsided. I fit into the second two categories of what's listed above, so I mustered up the courage to use the platform myself. It started out with panic attacks...slowly morphing into extreme anxiety. Nevertheless I kept going because I wanted to get married and had no one to do it with! And I wasn't going to be able to do it when my days looked like this:

After venting to my mom, something I often do and something that leads me to places I wouldn’t dare tread if it were up to myself, she told me of a website in which I could converse with people to build friendships with both genders.

I was facing loneliness at the time and didn’t have much of a support system. It was still a dating site, but because I could try to develop likeminded friendships with people of my own gender, I hesitantly signed up

I met some lovely people and had pleasant conversations during my time online. I still had men twice my age trying to talk to me, which had all my fears on guard and ready to attack, but I managed to keep them at bay through signing out immediately and waiting about a week before I logged back on again.

So.....How did my Seamus sneak through the walls of anxiety and fear and into the depths of my heart?

1. He was from Ireland. That’s why we started conversing, I saw where he was from and literally couldn’t resist saying hi.

2. He made me belly laugh from 4937 miles away. I had no idea who this man was at the time, but his sense of humor reeled me in.

3. Similar beliefs kept us talking for hours. Not only was he funny, but he had substance to him. He genuinely listened to my ideas and countered where he thought I was wrong or injected his own ideas without me ever feeling like I was stupid or silly.

4. He slowly built up my trust by just being my friend. I was obviously not one who could just open up to a stranger online, let alone date them off the cuff. We communicated for awhile before either of us expressed an interest.

5. The timing really worked out….now I do mean providentially, we were at the perfect place at the perfect time. On a less romantic note, I had insomnia that kept me up until passed the middle of the night and he prevented my frustration in being sleep deprived by talking to me in the mornings before work. (Sometimes sickness has its perks) ;).

For those 5 simple reasons, I could consider having a relationship with Seamus. He was my close confidant before he confessed his feelings toward me and I loved him before meeting him in person. We are by no means conventional in comparison to others who date online, and that’s okay by me. What matters is that we are life partners that continually push each other to be better, laugh harder, and be patient.